are you glued to that bench

  • You're about as washed up the Jersey Shore after Hurricane Sandy.
  • "Hey, can I have a ball?" (After refusal) "That's OK; I'll get one when you pitch."
  • Who's taking the loss today?
  • Show us your home run pitch
  • At least you can't blow any saves sitting on the bench!
  • Ball. Ball. Go ahead and start with Strikes whenever you're ready!
  • This is the guy we want!
  • You've been on the bench so long you've got enough splinters to build a house.
  • Nice change-up, but let's see your fastball!
  • You're gonna wear out the wood on that bench!
  • You in dry-dock down there?
  • Go out and throw some gas on that fire!
  • May as well go home (name of closer), we wont be needing you tonight.
  • The average age down there is deceased!
  • A no-hitter for you is when you go a game without hitting someone!
  • You glued to that bench?
  • Are you still active? Are you the bullpen coach now?
  • You've been cut, its in today's paper!
  • Dead Man Walking!
  • You're gonna blow up real good!
  • I hear you're on your way to Cooperstown!, Go on Sat. and its 1/2 price
  • Nice uniform, where's the Star Trek convention!
  • Isn't it time you retired?
  • Does that Chewing Tobacco have steroids in it?
  • The camera's on you, look busy!
  • First one of you to actually throw a strike can start next game!
  • I'll pay for the pizza if you go get it!
  • Is it Father/Son day down there?
  • You better start working on a knuckleball!
  • Are you just sitting there waiting for next year?
  • You always lose control at the same time, right after the anthem!
  • Aren't you the Waterboy?
  • I just saw your name on a Where Are They Now list!
  • Did you ever think you'd be sitting next to __________?
  • What's it like owning a glass arm?
  • You haven't moved from that bench in so long they should call you judge
  • Lookit! We've got the 7th,8th,9th & 10th starter
  • Bet you wish you went to college now!
  • How many pitches have you got?..work on a changeup, that'll be one
  • You've got 3 pitches, slow, slower, and slowest!
  • You guys could probably start, in Medicine Hat!
  • How about giving that glove to Cooperstown? They're starting a LOSER exhibit
  • I hear they're grooming you to be the bullpen ballboy
  • I've got the scouting report on you, it says get you in ASAP!
  • Pitcher got a rubber arm!
  • You couldn't save anything at a Kmart sale!
  • How's the bus ride to (minor league affiliate),______?
  • Don't give up, they might let you close......if we get up by 10
  • I've seen better arms on a chair!
  • I've seen better control at an AA meeting!
  • So this is what they call talent dilution
  • Are you guys really from New York?
  • Your Bio says all you throw is garbage, what does that mean?
  • Do you find all these empty seats distracting?
  • (Bullpen phone rings) If that's my wife, tell her I left 5 min ago!
  • (Bullpen phone rings) That'll be for me, I ordered a Pizza
  • Is it in your contract that you have to throw like a girl?
  • I only have to be here for 9 innings, but you have to play for the Phillies all year!
  • What position are you playing? Left-Out?
Share This