Spoken Player Responses:

• Don't mess with us, people. We're full of steroids and could snap at any time!
• These fans are crazy! I bet Steinbrenner signs them in the offseason
• Heckle: "Hey, how's your wife and my kid?" Comeback: "The wife's great. The kid's retarded!"
• Sorry, I don't speak "idiot", go get a translator
• I don't know what your problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce!
• How many times do I need to flush before you go away?
• If I throw a stick, will you leave?
• If you're so important, why aren't the seats facing you?
• Too much sugar this morning?
• Here's an alcoholic who doesn't want to remain anonymous.
• Looks like the face on the bar room floor finally got up
• I'm sorry, I don't speak alcoholic
• I hope your face clears up
• What's the matter, kid, didn't you get enough attention at home?
• What, was there no tractor pull on tonight, you had nothing to do?
• Is that your face or did you just catch a foul ball?
• This is my job. I don't knock the mop out of your hand when you're at work
• I don't show up at your job and unplug the Slurpee machine
• I'm sorry, I don't know how to deal with you, I'm a ballplayer not a proctologist.
• It's alright, I remember my first beer

Fan Comebacks:

• I already knew you had a sense of humor, I've seen you play!
• "Hey, can I have a ball?" (After refusal) "That's OK; I'll get one when you pitch."

Umpire Comebacks:

• Submitted - At a game a spectator said to the umpire - "do you know how to ump the game". The ump said "Yes, I also know how to remove a spectator from the sidelines"

• (Hey Blue, You're missing a great game!) I know, I'm working this one instead

Heard a good one? We'd like to hear it...

Your Name	*only if you want
Your Email Address	*only if you want
Subject	*only if you want
Message
Image Verification Please enter the text from the image [ Refresh Image ] [ What's This? ]