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Regina Brett

If you're going to heckle, then learn to do it right

Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Regina Brett
Plain Dealer Columnist

Jeffrey Swiecicki could use some help.

He's the fan who made a federal case after being kicked out of a Tribe game in 2001 for taunting then-Indians outfielder Russell Branyan.

On Friday, a federal appeals court ruled that Indians fans have a right to heckle ballplayers as long as the fans are not drunk or too rowdy.

Five years ago, a cop working security thought it was profane when Swiecicki yelled, "Branyan, you have a fat ass!" and "Branyan, you suck!"

I've not taken a good hard look at Mr. Branyan's derriere, so I don't know if I concur. But calling someone "fat ass" and yelling "you suck" is lame.

Swiecicki considers himself a Tribe fan. I've seen better fans at Home Depot.

If Branyan did in fact look like he hijacked a Twinkie truck, Swiecicki had better options to yell, such as these:

Who dressed the keg?

Only one man to a uniform!

You better feed your butt - it's eating your pants!

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