You swing like a rusty gate!
How's your Japanese?
You want some pepperoni on that slice?
You're getting less hits than an Amish website!
How did you make the team?You couldn't drive anyone home if you were in their driveway!
I've seen better cuts with rusty razor blades!
You couldn't hit the road!
I've seen better swings in a park!
I've seen Tyson take better swings!
I've seen better swings on a condemned playground!
Get the kids off of that swing!
I've seen monkeys take better swings!
I've seen better swings on a porch!
(To Catcher) Hey_______, let go of his bat!
Draw a chalk outline around this guy and call the coroner!
Swing the bat, only the mailman walks around here!
Did you get a haircut Samson?
The ball's in the catchers mitt!
Swing your purse, Sally!
Drop your purse and pick up a bat!
Dead man walking!
Hey, Dracula, wake up your bat!
Save that swing for the mailbox league
You call that a cut? I call that a scratch!
Leave the piñatas for the kids...
You couldn't hit the floor if you fell out of bed
Hit the weight room! (After lazy fly ball)
You couldn't hit water if you fell out of a boat
Everybody move in!
If that's your best swing, I'd hate to see your golf game!
You could buy a cup of coffee with that batting average!
You get a free bowl of soup with that swing?
Is it hard to hold the bat with your hands around your throat?
We want a batter not a broken ladder
Couldn't hit a bull in the butt with a shovel
Are your hands bleeding yet?
No Batter, No Batter...
You couldn't hit yourself out of a wet paper bag!
If you're not going to swing the bat, you could at least walk back to the dugout faster (After called Strike 3)
Hit it with your wallet! (To a guy with a fat contract)
You couldn't knock snow off a rope.
Nice swing Alice.
You couldn't hit sand if you fell off a camel
You couldn't hit the side of a barn with a bass fiddle
Put a Band-Aid on that cut!
Good thing they designate you as hitter, you'd never know otherwise
Who left the helmet in the box? (for short hitters)
You'd have to pick up and hit the ball 3 times to get to the fence!
Dont worry, You're more of a glove man anyhow!
Stop window-shopping and take a swing!
Its the Hitless Wonder!
Don't lay an egg out there
You couldn't knock the skin off of rice pudding!
You'll be sent down soon, they're starting to throw curves!
Did you have your wheaties today?
You're more of a batting practice hitter!
Know what a batting average is?
Do they have the strike out sign on?
Welcome to the Big Leagues!
This At-Bat is costing us $25,000
Them curve balls sure is curvy eh?
It's going to be a curve!........It's going to be a fastball!
Use your bat next time!!
Check the pine tar on this guys bat!
Take a mulligan on that swing!
Ya gotta swing that bat yourself, batteries ain't included!
Wait for your pitch!
You couldn't hit a beach ball with a tree trunk
Didn't you just sell me a hotdog?
Pitch him underhand!
You guys took batting practice and the pitching machine threw a no-hitter
Go get a splinter!
DH means Doesn't Hit?
Wake em up!
Swing!...(and a miss)..Shouldn't have listened!
Swing!...(and a called strike)..Told ya so!
You couldn't knock a mailbox off with that swing
This guy couldn't bat an eye!
You couldn't hit the ocean from the end of the pier!
Bring out the Jelly 'cause you got jammed
Bring out the butter 'cause you got toasted
Bring out the textbooks 'cause you got schooled
He couldn't hit a balloon!
You can't hit the ball with the bat on your shoulder!
Swing Hard! Just in case you hit it!
Try the other side of the plate!
Just put the stick down and nobody gets hurt! (ugly swing)